Jokes of the day!

 Jokes of the day! 

“From man’s sweat and God’s love, beer came into the world.” – St. Arnulf of Metz

Myself and my wife were in London a few years ago and decided to take the open top bus tour. Our guide was a typical funny cockney Londoner. We were passing a church and he mention it was called St Brigid’s Catholic Church. He asked were there any Americans on the bus and lots of people put up their hands and shouted “yes we are” then he asked if there were any Irish. We both reluctantly put our hands up. He then proceeded to tell us that St Brigid was one of Ireland’s patron saints and also the patron saint of beer. He said she is know for the miracle of changing bath water into beer. Then he said, “unlike the American patron saint Budweiser who did exactly the opposite”

Saint Brigid hoften associated with miracles  She is even considered a patron saint of beer,  Legends say she turned dirty bathwater into beer for lepers 

A little girl was sitting at the kitchen table, drawing a picture of her mom and dad with crayons. She started thinking about her grandparents... but what about her grandparents' parents? And their parents?
Thoughtfully, she asked her mother, "Mom, where do people come from? I mean, does everyone have parents?" her mother answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and then those children had their own children, and on and on until today."

 

The girl nodded. After a while, she needed a blue crayon for he sky in her drawing, so she went to her room to get another crayon box.

When she got to her room, she saw that her father was there, setting up a shelf. She asked him the same question. The father answered, "Many years ago, there were monkeys from which the human race evolved."

The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, you ricked me.You told human race was created by God but dad said they evolved from monkeys."

Mother answered," well dear  it's very simple I told you my side of the family,your father told about his!

Use 'Timbuktu' in a sentence

A poetry contest had come down to two semi-finalists: a Yale graduate and a redneck. They were given a word, then allowed a minute to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was "Timbuktu".

First to recite his poem was the Yale graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said:

Slowly across the desert sand
Trekked a lonely caravan.
Men on camels, two by two
Destination: Timbuktu. 

The crowd loved it! No way could the redneck top that, they thought. The redneck calmly made his way to the microphone and recited:

Me and Tim a-huntin went,
Met three sluts in a pop-up tent.
They was three, and we was two,
So I bucked one, and Tim bucked two. 

'Timbuktu'--A city in Africa

-Searched and illustrated by Tejinder Kamboj
  
              (1940 -20??)